Why We Choose the Wrong Guys

PICK ME! PICK ME!

Why we love the guys who are NOT ALL IN. 😱

You know the ones…
🍬Bread crumbers
🍩Not ready for a new relationship because they're going through or fresh out of a divorce/breakup.
🍫 Big important jobs and are just super busy...
🍪Newly divorced parent navigating dating and being a dad and putting his kids above all else.
🍭Simply not sure if he wants a relationship or actually tells you he doesn’t.

🔥They’re hot.
⚛️We have chemistry.
🙏🏼We want them to want us back as much as we want them!

This combo triggers our primal knee jerk visceral response -

FEAR OF ABANDONMENT!!!!

No matter if you have truly been abandoned in your life or not - we all have a primal wiring to seek to be apart of a tribe for survival. To belong.

Back when we were cave people - abandonment meant death. We couldn’t survive on our own. BUT WE CAN NOW!

🧠Then, to top it off, our brains tell us…psst….we need to fix ourselves in order for them to be ALL IN and not abandon us. We need to fix all those parts of us that are too much, not enough, needy, unlovable, and unworthy PRONTO so this guy will pick us!!!!

🧠 HURRY - we need to be thinner, prettier, more interesting…we need to be different to be worthy so they’ll pick us

KNOW THIS:
💛You are human that your nervous system is triggered this way. Nothing has gone wrong.
💛You can become aware of these triggers - and then consciously choose how you want to react to them.
💛You can feel the icky abandonment vibrations in your body AND decide not to make them mean that person is your person. Or that you need to be any different in order to be loved.
💛You can feel the desire to get their attention and affection to relieve you from the uncomfortableness AND choose on purpose not to act on it.

Easier said than done, YOU LOVABLE YOU, but can be done.

Loves,
Stacy

Can’t wait and want help with all this dating and love BS NOW? Schedule a free consult call 💋

Reminder - I write these post in my voice from my experiences dating and coaching. Any way you identify, I am happy to help you find your person/she/he/them/they! LOVE FOR ALL!!! 💜🖤💛💚